[FOR ERLA] levi x reader [anything you can do]

So I just wanted to say that this is for my grammy, who passed away early this year, September something-or-other, somewhere around the end of the month.  She was in a state of depression, was hoarding, was on a lot of medication, and her health was in a serious decline.  She passed away after spending two weeks with blood sugar at and/or above 500, without telling anyone, and died in the hospital around 3 am at 76 years old, even though she didn't have to.  She was sad enough that she gave up, even after living through a fairly abusive childhood and, later on, cancer.  

 I'm just going to tell you now, if you ever are having issues with depression, please tell someone, because I can tell you right now that my heart is absolutely broken, and you're not helping anyone by throwing your life away, suicidal or not.  Depression can kill you without you wanting it to, and it can kill the people around you too.

When she wasn't sick, I used to go with my grammy to the back bedroom of her apartment and sit on the bed, and she would put on CDs to listen to.  This song in particular was my favorite, and I'd make her play it again and again, and sometimes I sing it at home when I think about her, but it never sounds as happy as it did.  I wrote this to remember her when she was at least happier than she was at the end, and the last "I love you" I never got to say.

 If you read all that, thank you.  Have a cookie and enjoy the story >u<  


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Anything you can do I can do better
I can do anything better than you


 He could hear her voice from outside the castle, a happy song that sounded much too sad coming from her lips.  It was supposed to be light and endearing, but she made it sound...melancholy.
 
 It was unlike her to do such a thing.

   
No you can't
Yes I can
No you can't
Yes I can
No you can't
Yes I can, yes I can


 Her words were bogged down with tears that she wouldn't let fall, with her twists and turns in the light midnight showers that barely made a sound on the window panes.  The pitch blackness of the night, the soft rain, and the strained singing all came together to make a horrible symphony, stitched together with the emotions she could barely let herself feel.
 
 Abandonment.
 
 Resentment.
 
 Anger.
 
 Despair.
 
 Need.

   
Anything you can be I can be greater
Sooner or later I'm greater than you


 He could practically see inside her head.  He knew what was going through it, and he knew that damn song, that song she and the other hopeless girl from his squad used to sing at the top of their lungs and earn themselves cleaning duty.
  
 He knew how alone she felt.
 
 He felt that way every day, but he would never, ever show it.  Never.

 
No you're not
Yes I am
No you're not
Yes I am
No you're not
Yes I am, yes I am


 He knew that every moment she spent out in the rain, she felt more and more helpless, wanted more and more to just forget about that stupid girl.

 But she couldn't.  She could never forget.
 
 She could just keep singing that song.

 
Any note you can sing, I can sing higher
I can sing any note higher than you


 He knew that all she wanted was to say 'I love you' one last time.

 Just one last time.

   
No you can't
Yes I can
No you can't
Yes I can
No you can't
Yes I can
No you can't
Yes I can

 
 He knew he should let himself be dragged down the halls, wrap his cloak around her damp form and shove her inside, scolding her for being out in the dark past curfew.  

 And yet he didn't.

 Because he knew.

   

Anything you can say I can say softer
I can say anything softer than you

 



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